Kids Say the Darndedamndest Things.

Some of my favorite responses:

Question: "What is one stereotype that you have ever heard?"
KM's response: "chineas people eat cats and dogs."
RM's response: "The song you just heard is a stereotype."
MH's response: "M1 is Mexican and she has a blue jacket, but where is yours M2 and P?"

Question: "Define: Secondary Source."
CM's response: "I can have the fruit mom."

Question: "Fill in the missing fact.
1. Men that wear eyeglasses are very intelligent.
2. ____________________________ (should be 'Jason wears eyeglasses')
Therefore, Jason is very intelligent."
CM's response: "Girls that wear contacts are very nice."

Does Jesus know how to Dougie?

I just got back to my classroom from our stunning Christmas Concert that definitely did not fail to please anyone...except for maybe the Jews in the audience...and the Muslims...and probably the atheists. I was shocked at how openly Jesus Christ was discussed in school. Being a Christian, I have no problem with it philosophically, but realistically, there are Jews and Muslims (the latter view Jesus as a prophet, but not the Savior of the world) in our school that probably were a bit turned off, if not offended, by the spectacle.

A few highlights from the show (remember that this is a public school and in front of 600 students):

"Let's put Christ back into Christmas this year. We need to celebrate Jesus Christ and honor His birthday."

"'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house; Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse."

Boy on stage: "Christmas is about love and giving, not necessarily material things, but of ourselves selflessly."
(Applause)
Teacher conducting: "That was great, I love the 12 days of Christmas. Now, our dance team is going to perform 'Teach Me How to Dougie.'"
(Wild Applause)

I stand firm in the fact that there is no better way to honor Jesus Christ in this Christmas season than to pump some Cali Swag District and be taught how to dougie. It's also worth mentioning that almost every teacher was blushing at the fact that the choregraphy of the dance included the girls nearly grinding the floor and showing their goods through their short skirts...at 12 years old.

Pictures and video to come.

Drugs in the pocket? No biggie.

I've realized that in addition to being a teacher, I'm also a life coach. With 60 female students, I've become more of a psychiatrist and mediator than anything. Moral lessons are plentiful, but some don't go quite as I plan them to go.

CB: "Mr. Lowe, can I talk to you in the hall?"

Me: "Sure."

We go out into the hallway.

CB: "Mr. Lowe, P is spreadin' some stuff, some rumors. My SUPPOSED friend is spreadin' crap about me."

(Something worth noting: this "supposed friend" threatened CB and told her that she and two other classmates were going to jump her only three weeks prior)

Me: "Well, maybe you shouldn't be 'friends' with her anymore. Did you ever think about that possibility? Wasn't it only a few weeks ago that you were crying in my classroom in fear that she and C and K were going to jump you?"

CB: "Well yeah, but we cool now, Mr. Lowe."

I think for a second, then begin my teaching moment that is going to change her life. I mean, seriously, this girl's perspective is going to be forever changed after I say what I'm about to say...

Me: "C, there are just some people that you shouldn't be around. For example, would you ever hang out with someone if you knew that she had a bag of cocaine in her pocket?"

(The obvious answer that 98% of the rest of humanity would give is a resounding no.)

CB: Silence...... "Um, but what if-"

Me: "No, C, it should not take you this long to answer my question. There are no 'what ifs,' no technicalities, no details. 'Yes' or 'no,' would you hang out with someone who had cocaine?"

CB: "What about weed?"

Me: "Okay. You need to say 'absolutely not.' You should never be around people with drugs, no matter who they are. Drama is P's drug; stay away from her! Just like you should stay away from people with drugs, stay away from her and her drug of choice: drama."

Teaching Moment Scoreboard
Me: 0 Kids with drugs: 1

Eleanor Roosevelt and her slave brigade

Each day, at the beginning of class, we do what my school calls "brainwork." I usually have a quote or a penetrating question that will cause them to think deeply and analyze it from another perspective. Monday's quote was a portion of one of my favorites:

"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood." -Theodore Roosevelt

I asked them why the credit would belong to someone who is "marred by dust and sweat and blood." I asked them what this quote means to them personally. The following conversation ensued with VGM, one of the more intelligent students I have.

VM: "Wasn't there a woman with that name?"

Me: "A woman named Theodore Roosevelt?"

VM: "Yeah, or something like that. She did a lot of stuff."

Me: "Do you mean Eleanor Roosevelt ?"

VM: "Oh, yeah, was that Theodore Roosevelt's wife?"

Me: "No, she was actually the wife of President Franklin D. Roosevelt, who was also a president, just 20 years later."

VM: "Oh. Didn't she help with the slaves. Didn't she build the tunnels under the ground?"

Me: "No. That was Harriet Tubman. She did that during the Civil War, Eleanor Roosevelt wasn't even alive."

On a related note, I gave an example from the Civil War to help explain the historical fiction genre and a good chunk of my students thought the Civil War was fought in the 1920s.

Call me!.....and don't trust black dudes

A note one of my students gave me prior to leaving for Thanksgiving break:

"Dear Mr. Lowe,
Hav a faburistic Thanx-Givin. Love you, we all do...
tell ur wife 2 call me!
901-xxx-xx50
Sincerely,
Candie Monster
-CB"

How nice. My wife never called. Bummer.

Then, as I was grading the exams they took on Tuesday before the break, I came to a shocking answer that details just a lil' bit of racism in one of my students. We've been researching the case of Emmett Till (see previous post) and so the whole test had to do with Emmett Till and the events surrounding his death. As a wrap-up to it all, the last question on the test was:

"Based on the facts and testimonies given, whom do you believe? Why? (Remember, you need to base your decision in FACTS from everything we've read)"

The correct answer would consist of either siding with Emmett Till or his accused murderers based on an assortment of facts (there was more evidence for Emmett Till's side; there wasn't enough evidence to convict the murderers; the witnesses gave perfect testimony to convict; etc.).

RC's response: "I think black men can't be trusted."

Ummm.......a brief history - or civics - lesson may be in store.

Thanksgiving!

In the spirit of the giving of thanks, a few things I'm thankful for:






And the best of all...

Vocabulary Blunders

Although grading is one of my very, very least favorite tasks, I do love seeing all the random answers I get on vocabulary quizzes. Here are a few of the best examples from Friday's quiz:

1. Segregate: "I dog and cat are separate at the pet shop." --AD

2. Segregate: "He was segregated be his girl friend." --MR

3. Indigenous: "The boy and the girl were indigenous in the store together." --MR